I don’t know about you but I’ve been having so many breakthroughs this pandemic season.
Spending a lot of time in self-reflection is helping me bring awareness to so many old patterns and habits.
In this previous blog post, I talk about how I was raised to be independent and strong. And how I lead with masculine energy and I spend most of my time in ‘doing’ mode.
In that blog post, I also shared a few things that I’m doing to shift this masculine energy and old pattern. But I didn’t really explain why I want to change this way of being. And this is what today’s post is about.
Shifting Masculine Energy and Old Patterns
About a decade or so ago, I met this friend of a friend for the first time. I might have asked her about her background education and she replied with: “I have five degrees.” She might have said six, I don’t remember since it’s been a long time.
Basically, she was bragging and taking great pride of her accomplishments and educational qualifications.
Apart from this being a masculine way to behave, this is the same family conditioning that I was shaped with.
The truth is that while being an independent and strong woman is a great thing, it also has its challenges when it comes to attracting a man and a healthy relationship.
When a man is looking for a partner, he’s looking for someone who understands and gets him. Someone who accepts him and who is able to connect with him on an emotional level.
That woman’s greatest asset – her competence, her drive, her impressive credentials – none of them are strong selling points to most men who are looking for love.
Being smart and independent has nothing to do with how you make a man feel on a day-to-day basis and your ability to connect with him on a deeper level.
And believe me, I was misled for years and I just came to this realization now. That my fierce independence is actually blocking me from manifesting a partner.
Where do we go from here?
In your career, while making big decisions, when searching for property to rent, you can be in your masculine side all you want.
But when it comes to dating and meeting men for that purpose, you want to practice connecting and being playful and fun.
Try to practice connecting with him instead of talking about your accomplishments and credentials.
Let him initiate dates and plans. Lean back and let him show you whether he’s interested in pursuing you or not.
I want to add that I’m not asking you to pretend to be someone that you’re not. It’s about growing on a spiritual level and becoming someone who can reciprocate thoughtfulness and intimacy. I myself am still practicing this with friends and my Betta fish!
I’m also not someone who promotes being vulnerable with a man as soon as you connect with him. What I mean is being playful and connecting with him in ways other than your achievements and education credentials. Does this make sense?
Please let me know if you enjoyed this topic and if you have any questions. Do you want to learn more dating tips?
What are you struggling with the most now? Let me know in the comments so I can create content that supports you.