I got a DM on Instagram sometime last week with someone asking me if I was a life coach. In that same message, they shared another person’s account handle and asked me if I’m like them.
I replied that yes, I’m a life coach and shared what makes my coaching unique in one sentence.
Of course, I didn’t reply to the question about how much I’m ‘like’ that other coach or even check their account.
Why you Should Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Because each person’s life path is very unique, it’s really impossible to compare yourself, your life or your progress to anyone.
I find it very self-deprecating and self-sabotaging to constantly compare yourself and where you are to other people.
It’s even more insane to do this with random people on social media who you don’t even know!
I understand that today’s digital lifestyle makes you glued to your Instagram and following others.
But I encourage you to follow those whose message and story resonates with yours. That way, if you do choose to aspire to be like them, then at least there’s value in following their socials.
The only time that I look at other people’s social accounts is when I aspire to live like them. So I don’t feel envious or jealous when I watch their stories or check out their feeds. Instead, I see it as a manifestation tool for me to get closer to my dream life.
What Happens when you Compare yourself or Life to Others
I noticed that when some of my friends compare themselves or their abilities with someone else, they feel really bad about themselves.
They feel as if they’re not good enough and that someone else is better than them or ahead of the game.
When you constantly feel like you’re in competition with others, your sense of self-worth will really go down.
And when you don’t feel good about yourself, you attract people and situations that amplify this low self-worth.
As if it’s not enough that we had and still have parents that constantly tell us that we’re not good enough.
So what you’re doing is basically treating yourself the same way that your parents wrongly treated you.
You should always feel that you’re amazing and that you’re a gem and a prize. No matter what your skills are or what your life looks like!
What you can do to Shift this Mindset
Start by re-parenting yourself, loving yourself and really putting yourself as a priority in your own life.
Another thing you can do is understand that the only person you should be competing with is yourself!
You don’t need to compete with others. Instead, focus on you and do what you can to grow and evolve as a person.
That way, you will always feel good about yourself and your progress. Because the only person you’re comparing yourself to is the old version of you.
Surround yourself with people who support you, elevate your mood and tell you how amazing you are.
Avoid those who have this negative pattern of comparing themselves and their lives to others. They are your worst companions.
Not many things get me angry or out of my calm state of being. But when someone tells me how they keep comparing themselves or their lives to others, I get speechless and really frustrated!
Imagine if I were to say that I wish I had a different life and supportive parents. I actually don’t.
Because if I didn’t have an adverse childhood, I would have never found my true self, my purpose or the way that I can help others.
Think about it. And feel free to comment with your thoughts. Because I really want to understand why people play this comparison game!