When I did inner child therapy work in late October 2019, I had no idea that the integration would take around three years!
At first, I needed space to be alone, and the pandemic timing was perfect.
After two months in Bali in early 2020 (right before the pandemic), I returned to Dubai. We had about two months or so of lockdowns, but I chose to stay in my apartment a bit longer. I guess my soul needed to retreat to process the deep and intense work I did as part of inner child group therapy.
I also did tantra (teenage years de-conditioning) on that same trip. So I had two very intense back-to-back workshops to process. All I wanted was to be left alone. The work was very profound and deep.
Pandemic Self Awareness
The pandemic season was a perfect time for reflection, and it brought everything to the surface. From friendships and connections that no longer served me to old belongings that I had to get rid of and major realizations about my relationship with my parents.
In hindsight, I wouldn’t want things to be any different. The time and space that came with being locked up at home by myself were what I needed to integrate the old and make space for the new finally.
Of course, the healing timeline wasn’t straightforward. It never is. Sometimes I felt like this was it, but then something new came up that needed to be cleared.
In the past two and a half years or, more accurately, three years (since I did inner child work), I cut off most of my old friends, decided to close down my life coaching business and am moving to Bali for six months next year.
The changes weren’t easy but much-needed.
Toxic Release
When it came to my old friends, I realized that almost everyone from my past was simply a reflection of my own unhealed past self. The patterns that showed up in those connections mirrored my parents’ toxic ways and conditioning.
It took exactly three years for me to see everything and to cut off everyone who reflected the toxic ways of my parents.
My life coaching business was also a reflection of my family conditioning and not a reflection of my true self. I don’t regret starting it, as it was part of the journey back to my true, authentic self.
Starting January next year, I’ll finalise my ebook, publish it, and write on my blog. That’s who I am in essence.
I’m a creative, a writer and a hippie. Not the businesswoman I was conditioned to be by my father.
This was another significant realization that came with the pandemic isolation. I feel blessed. I’m a writer and a book author.
The last major transformation comes in the form of moving countries. Another beautiful thing that came with the pandemic.
Where You Live Matters
I’m sure many of you have realized that where you live isn’t necessarily aligned with who you are.
In my case, post-inner-child work, I realized that city life wasn’t for me. And I’m not living in a place that matches my true, free-spirited personality.
I’ve always felt like my true self when in Bali and in the islands in general. But Bali is unique because it has a magical healing energy.
And next year, in July, I’ll be spending six months on the island and I’m so excited!
So my transformation started with healing my inner child and ended with cutting off all of my old friends, changing careers and deciding to move countries for a while.
I want to hear from you. What stage of transformation and self awareness are you in right now?
Have a lovely weekend ahead, and feel free to comment with your thoughts or questions!
Self Awareness: Inner child work and healing
