Online Versus Offline
I wanted to share some tips about making new friends since I suggested in my last Wellness Wednesday blog post that you connect with friends to get your spark back. If you missed that story, you can read it here.
I basically suggested connecting with like-minded people and being intentional about keeping in touch and planning meetups. Well, you might be wondering about how to meet like-minded people who can eventually be good friends?
So, if you’re thinking: “How do I find like-minded people who share my values and life outlook in the first place?” – then this blog post is for you.
I’ll start off by saying that I personally prefer to meet people in-person and not online. I tried meeting new people both online and offline and I can confirm that the online encounters never materialized into good friendships or even if they did, those connections didn’t last.
In fact, many people who I met online and decided to meet in person turned out to be not aligned with my values and personality for the most part.
Whenever I meet people IRL, there’s always an instant connection and knowing when our energies are aligned and it just feels right.
And that’s exactly how I made all of my friends in Bali who I’m still connected to until today.
My first ever trip to Bali was in September of 2016 and in my first week in Sanur, I met my first and best friend Ceria, who I’m still good friends with until today.
Ceria is so upbeat, bubbly, sociable and most importantly, loves a good laugh like me!
We both share our positive outlook/mindset to life, forever seeing the glass as half full, enjoying life’s simple things and always finding something to laugh about in each moment or situation!
How to Meet Like-minded People
When you do the deep inner work to find your true self, it truly doesn’t matter where you are.
Because wherever you go, your energy and vibe will attract those who are like you. So the saying “Your vibe attracts your tribe” is so true!
I met my first Bali friend Ceria through an American solo traveler who was dining at the rooftop restaurant/bar of my Sanur hotel (first ever hotel I stayed in on my first ever Bali trip!).
The ironic thing is that I was at that bar looking for men and not looking to meet other female solo travelers!
It was my first time in Bali and first week, before joining a group wellness retreat in Ubud.
I randomly chose to stay in Sanur because I didn’t know where else to stay before the retreat.
After having a great conversation with that American solo traveler (she was one year younger than me), she introduced me to Ceria the next day. And all three of us were hanging out before that American woman left Bali. Sanur was her last stop and she was in her last few days, before leaving Bali back to the U.S.
I also want to add that the American woman met Ceria and her mom at the local Starbucks because she’s extroverted and both Ceria and her mom are sociable personalities too.
What’s interesting is that I didn’t keep in touch with that American woman (she’s now married and has a son but we were both single at the time we met in 2016) but Ceria became a really good friend of mine.
Each trip I visited Bali since 2016, I’ve been hanging out with Ceria and we always have great laughs together!
Ceria taught me what real, genuine friendship is and how to be a friend. She showed me what being a real friend is by being one herself. No hidden agendas or trying to take advantage of the other person.
I share this last point because I had many fake friends in the past and this was a result of my toxic upbringing and parents.
I honestly didn’t know what being in a genuine friendship felt like until I became friends with Ceria.
Ceria also introduced me to another Indonesian friend, who I also catch up with whenever I visit Bali.
So if you’re wondering how or where to make new friends when traveling solo, I encourage you to start by doing the healing work and finding your true self from under the family conditioning.
Your healing journey will take you places where you feel a sense of belonging. And when you feel confident and that you are in the right place, you will naturally attract the right people to you.
Some Connections are Meant for a Short Time
I wanted to add that I also met some really like-minded people who didn’t become my friends and that’s also OK.
When you’re traveling, the main thing to remember is to stay open and to always follow your intuition.
What I’m trying to say is not to try and force any type of connection. Let things flow.
Some people might not be meant to stay in your life but to only serve a purpose.
For example, the American solo traveler who introduced me to Ceria didn’t become a friend of mine although we had an amazing time in Bali (we actually spent her last few days in Bali hanging out together and having great conversations).
Although she was also a fun, upbeat person and we were both very independent and strong women, our connection wasn’t meant to last. Her role in my life was to connect me to Ceria, who would then become a good friend of mine.
So when you’re out exploring places and traveling, stay open to meeting others but remember to feel what the other person is showing you. And don’t force any connection.
I would love to hear your thought on this topic. Do you find it challenging to make new friends when traveling? Do you have a preferred way to meet new people? If so, what is that way?
Ending the post with a photo of Ceria and I from April, 2017. Almost a decade since we first met in 2016, and we’re still laughing in the same way!
Love,
Leela
